In the world of dance, each style has its own unique identity. For example, in ballroom dancing the Waltz is elegant and graceful; Tango is dramatic and passionate; Quickstep is lively and playful. When I dance each style, I embody its identity. Identity as relating to sense of self is a highly complex topic, encompassing multiple types and sub-types, far beyond the scope of this blog. But I have been reflecting on my own identity(ies) after retiring from the federal government last December.
Yesterday at a friend’s retirement party, the topic came up. When chatting with other recent retirees, I asked, “What did you do in your career and what are you doing now?” Former technical writers and computer programmers and marketing consultants lit up when sharing about their new chapters as writers and artists and musicians.
Since leaving my scientific career, I’ve been focusing on creative passions including writing and dancing. My publisher encouraged updating my social media accounts, which invite a short bio. It’s an interesting exercise to sum oneself up in <100 characters. I wrote, “mother, author, scientist, mentor, dancer, traveler…” This list is incomplete, and does not convey the depth and personal meaning of the roles I cherish, or their interconnectedness. As Walt Whitman said, “I am large, I contain multitudes.”
When missing my scientist persona (e.g., I was recently introduced as “Val, the substitute bowler” after being “Dr. Valerie Zartarian” throughout my career) and feeling a need to solve my personal identities integration problem, another quote (from Watering the Soul by Courtney Peppernell) reminded me that I don’t have to: “Sometimes it isn’t so much about stitching yourself together but rather about unraveling all that you thought you were and all that you thought you knew…”.
Who do you say you are?
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