The phrase “out of my league,” with a sports origin, refers to a skill too advanced for one’s current level. This weekend I volunteered as a substitute in a local bowling league, to try something new and because the 2023 documentary Join or Die (based on the 2000 book, Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community) made an impression. I was literally out of my league as a beginner among advanced longtime bowlers. They were welcoming, despite my low score, but I struggled to connect (e.g., asking why we need to switch lanes)–so, unfortunately, I felt as if I were “bowling alone.” That uncomfortable, newcomer feeling is something I’ve experienced many times in my life.
In college, I boldly and naively tried out for activities out of my (Ivy) league, including: the theater club, where I learned my drama background didn’t qualify me for university-level plays; the tennis team, where I embarrassed myself playing against classmates who had been competing since they could hold a racket; crew team, for the coxswain position, despite having no rowing experience; and dance team, where I must have thought my high school roles in Pippin and West Side Story qualified me to compete against Princeton dance majors. I did not make any of those teams, which was humbling.
For those college dance team tryouts, the captain placed me in the front row of the group of talented women auditioning. I was expected to instantly pick up the jazz choreography sequences in real time, with everyone behind me watching. The first count of 8 was OK. The second and third counts were less OK, and the first section had escaped my brain when she called out, “From the top!” And so on, and so on, until I felt like Lucille Ball in a hilarious I Love Lucy episode (see “Lucy Takes Ballet Lessons”).
Now, as the only new student in my current adult group “advanced beginner” tap class — with a nationally-renowned teacher and several dozen women who have studied under her for years — I once again feel out of my league, just like Lucy in that dance scene. Only four weeks into the season, the choreography is so complex I need to study the video from class and practice at home, to keep up and avoid the teacher singling me out. And yet, I love the joy of movement, the camaraderie, the sound of tapping in unison, the satisfaction of tackling an intense mental and physical challenge.
Below is a favorite postcard I’ve had on my desk for decades. I’m proud of my younger and current self, willing to feel like a misfit (like the girl in the photo) for the sake of growth. I just saw this Kurt Vonnegut quote: “To practice any art, no matter how well or how badly, is a way to make your soul grow…”.
What art have you practiced that felt out of your league at first?
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